My two year old, Noah, is a bright, funny, and happy kid. We love him like crazy and he brings us all kinds of joy. However he’s at that stage in his life where he likes to test Mommy and Daddy’s warnings, gets into things he’s not supposed to, eat things he’s not supposed to, throws a temper when he doesn’t get his way, hits, and often does the complete opposite of what you ask him. Even my 6 month old, Aaron, can be a bit frustrating when all he wants is his mommy’s attention 24-hours a day. Now, all that being said, I do realize that these are stages that all children go through. All children. In fact, it’s these stages that help children learn crucial mental and emotional developmental skills and lessons. That doesn't mean it’s not discouraging, frustrating, or feel like just cause for murder.
Sometimes a learning process for Noah becomes a test of patience for daddy. There’s something in me that just doesn’t comprehend how one cannot learn and understand on initial counsel. Why does Noah still attempt to ride our dog, Morris, like a horse when he’s been told a million times not to? Why does he continue to throw his food on the floor when he’s not happy with the choice of condiment? Why can’t he just wake up one morning and decide to use the potty, doing away with diapers forever? Why not go to bed at 8pm and wake up at 8am like we’ve asked him to?
Is it a physical hearing problem? Of course not.
Is it selective hearing? Maybe.
Is he just a bad kid? Absolutely not.
Then what is it?
I was pondering all this the other day and asked myself, “why do I sometimes find it so hard to love my kids?”. I began to think of my own childhood/teenage years and I began to ask myself how my parents loved me through all the crap I had done. Multiple “principal’s office” visits, greediness, vanity, smoking cigarettes, stealing money from my dad’s underwear drawer, or any other selfish act I did out of spite. Yet, my parents still loved me then as much as they do now. How'd they get through it?!
Many times in the Bible, we’re identified not only as God’s creation (Gen 1:27) but His children (Rom 8:16); His kids (1 John 3:1). I began to think about how many times, as one of His children, I’ve disappointed God; how many times I’ve made God mad. David tells us in Psalm 7:11 that, “God judges the righteous, and God is angry with the wicked every day.” Every day? Aw, man…
Yet, He loves us and He loves us like crazy. So much so, in fact, that he gave one of His own kids to prove it (John 3:16-17).
In my thoughts about being patient with my own kids, the Spirit directed me to Romans 5:8-9: "God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we have now been justified by His blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God.” Despite God’s disappointment toward me and you and everyone else, he figured the best way to show his absolute, head-over-heals love for us was to give a big piece of Himself so that we would not lose and end up being with Him in the end.
Even though we might make it hard for God to love us at times, He understands we’re only human. He understands that we’re still growing. Our listening skills are still being shaped and our sins are just another part of our learning curve; crucial mental and emotional developmental lessons in our journey to being more like His son, Jesus. Sound familiar?
I need to take this lesson to heart when dealing with my own kids. They are still in process and learning and developing the same ways as I did. Much like my parents loved me despite my actions, much like God loves me despite my actions, I too will love my kids despite their actions.
Even so, how could you not love these faces?!
6-month old, Aaron
2 (& 1/2) year old, Noah
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